You know you've been to a hardcore boarding school if:

1. You know corporal punishments such as pick pin, catch your ears, and agama agama.

2. You know the term "soak and travel"

3. You have ever used alum to purify your water

4. You have ever had to fetch water using a guga from a duck infested well

5. You have ever eaten weird combinations of food such as Garri and Milo, or cabin biscuit in soaked garri

6. You have ever taken a bath with detergent, or know someone who did

7. You had a matron who can't speak English

8. You had a seemingly fragile matron who suddenly became agile when it was time to chase you and flog you

9. You have spent hours clearing grass with a blunt hoe, cutlass, or machete

10. You are very familiar with "langa langa"

11. You have had to catch the specimen for your biology lab dissection

12. You have been at the receiving end of a "koboko" (including the horrible 3 headed ones)

13. You have been flogged with a variety of objects, including but not limited to rulers, spoons, mop handle...

14. You have been taught English by a teacher who can barely speak the language

15. You know what the term "rub and shine" means

16. You have ever cooked rice or spaghetti with a boiling ring

17. You had taps that didn't produce water

18. You had restrooms in your classroom buildings, but still had to go to your dorm to use a restroom

19. You ever slept on a bunk bed with sagging springs

20. You have ever joined an angry mob of people to administer "jungle justice"

21. You had a 'school mother' who had more than 5 other school daughters and used all of you as her source of provisions and pocket money

22. You had teacher/teachers who raced you to class just so they could get there before you and punish you for coming in after them

23. You were scared of going into the locker room alone for fear of encountering huge 'mutant' rats

24. You have ever had your provisions 'nibbled on' by rats

25. You've been flogged or punished not because you were wrong, but just because the person felt like punishing you

26. You've ever had a chemistry lesson taught in pidgin English or some other vernacular

27. You've eaten "diluted" egusi soup...just because the dining prefect took half of the real food for him and his friends

28. You've spent extended amounts of time under a senior's bed (with sagging springs for that matter...)

29. You've randomly woken up and started running with masses of people, without knowing the cause of the group flight

30. You've had a vice principal scale your dorm fence under the pretext of "restoring order" (the mug ambo experience...
31. You ever ate indomie soaked in cold water

32. You ever water by putting your mouth over a bucket of water which is used to mop and bath as well

33. You have accidentally soaked ur last cornflakes or garri wit dettol water without knowing it coz u don’t even know da source of da water

34. You and your fellow students are supposed to be d ones to fill their teachers’ drums with water

35. Did you say u have to use da rest room in ur dorm? gal- its da rest room outside ur dorm! da 1 in da class n da dorm r all functionless...

36. You are familiar with terms like "German Stone"

37. You were always wishing you never got called to the courtyard

38. You ever found comfort in a bush rather than a rest room

39. You ran marathons with your teachers

40. You hid in lockers; bush or dark spots (dodging)

41. You or someone you know drank green water.

42. You went into town for bathing water

43. You have woken up to find your feet a chewed by rats

44. You or someone you know went into ceilings like criminals

46. You had to be flogged in order to complete ur injections at the clinic.

47. You had to go to the kitchen to boil water very early in the morning in winter (sorry, hamattan) so as to escape the threatening morning cold

48. You or people you knew urinated in water just to make sure u punish ur teachers who sent you (I never did that oh!)

49. You had to enter the library ceiling just to catch pigeons for the library attendants (watch out for full story).

50. You hid in Mr. Jiwa's house or to fall ill, just to dodge inspection.

51. You have been flogged just for flogging a wall.

52. You have been taught by great teachers like uncle Keni

53. You have been scared with "fire in the hostel" only to discover it was April fool's day

54. You have chested all the strokes meted on u only to be allocated extra

55. You have, in Js1, lost ur bucket and searched the whole hostel till u found it after a week or two.

56. You have, although no taps are running, fetched water for a particular senior consecutively for a full week.

57. You have walked kilometers out of school to get water, only to find out that the water u fetched is to be used by the dining hall to ensure u had dinner at 9:30pm (the younger ones won’t know this).

58. You know how important a visiting day is.

59. You can sing the song:
“it’s time to do para
its time to do para
for the senior students and the junior students
its time to do para. para! “

60. You have sketched the whole school in a map just to choose hiding spots from wicked seniors

61. You have slept in class coz u know what "all the boys move to the courtyard” meant for that night

62. You have scrubbed and mopped the veranda until you saw the reflection of ur face on the veranda

63. You jumped for joy when u discovered u made 60% on the dot. (a rare miracle).

64. You once in a while parasited for fried yam and rice at Mr. Deri's wife's joint.

65. You enjoyed eating in Mrs. Onoja's joint because her food was more that Mr. deri's.

66. You were made to settle an unofficial fee as u didn’t bring implements.

67. Your bag had been searched on resumption to ensure that there were no forbidden goods.

68. You had been suspended because you were seen in a dark corner (lover boys and lover girls).

69. You jogged as early as 6am in the morning (just when u are getting the sweetest part of ur sleep) just because mugambo said so.

70. You have at one time or the other enjoyed what is known as cross country; only for u to be reminded that the next agenda was Inspection. we all hated inspection.

71. You have( personal experience), alongside with ur friends cleared the school's football field just because u flashed Mr. Suleiman (that agric teacher who smokes his life out) popularly called "sulux" a touch light by mistake( full story coming soon).

72. You have washed your hands without water(Mr. Elisha's favourite)...(u wash ur hands without water while reacting to the pains inflicted on u by a koboko as u are flogged with ur two hands(palms) in a receiving position)...

73. You are called daughters of jezebel by a (man who is himself worse off) just for dancing to entertain a lot of seemingly bored students.

74. You have been told to contribute money you do not know anything about

75. You have been asked to contribute food for a cheeky senior

76. You have been refused entry into the dinning coz u are five minutes late

77.You have been asked to eat a very hot plate of eba within 10 seconds

78.You have been told to unblock a blocked toilet with ur hands

79.You have been dragged out of ur lesson because of someone’s offence

80.You have been punished 4 chatting with ur senior or ur mate which is de opposite sex

81.You’ve been asked to fetch 25 buckets of water just to throw it away

82. You’re familiar with the term "Jan Wiya"

83. You’ve been flogged naked in the bathroom for outlasting the time given to you to bath.

84. You’ve played table tennis on the dining tables.

85. You’ve been sent to study in the dining because there were no lights in the classes

86. You or someone you know has scaled the school fence for unnecessary reasons (running home and thing like that...lol)

87. You’ve ever stolen yams from the teachers’ yam barns...

88. You’ve ever stolen chicken from the teachers

89. You’ve used leftover coal to cook in the middle of the night (in the dinning)

90. You had lovely and crazy social nights (at least b4 Mogambo came)

91. You were flogged for free expression of words like ANDO, NYAH (courtesy John Abutu)

92. You were told to go and fill up a bucket or bowl (with eatables)

93. You slept on mattresses that were stepped on by seniors just coz they are seniors

94. You’ve used torn pieces of mattresses as foams to mop

95. You have eaten Eba with mixture of egusi and okoraw soup.

96. You were made to pay for repairing your desk and chair by the "La Principal". I thought I have seen it all. A STUDENT MADE TO PAY FOR REPAIR SCHOOL FURNITURE. SHOULD BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND BUT THAT'S GIFTED FOR YOU. Seriously, this is true

97. You have slept in the courtyard regardless of whether it's hot or cold

98. You were made to chop lots of grass for returning to school late after a holiday.

99. The BUSH was your way to salvation when you are in trouble eg courtyard days and etc.

100. You were made to bring extra book fill our empty library. This is a wierd one too. A STUDENT BEING FORCED TO CONTRIBUTE A BOOK TO THE LIBRARY.